Wanderlust

Appreciative Awareness

Do you ever feel that pull in your chest, that whisper asking, What now? I do. I sit here, glancing at the clock, knowing my day is technically full—chores, errands, hobbies—but craving more.

I think back to my younger years, when my weekends were always planned months in advance. It was like oxygen to me—having somewhere to go, something to anticipate. Then Richard entered my life, and suddenly, the need to plan vanished. I felt safe, content to simply be.

That restless voice is returning, yet it is different. Why? What is it I want? Excitement? Purpose? A spark that makes me wake up eager again. Is it my DNA? My mother was a wanderer. My father loved to travel. My ancestors were explorers.

Wanderlust—it sings in my blood, urging me to adventure. I remember Bali, booked on a whim, a pin dropped on a map I barely knew, and there, I found a kundalini awakening. Oaxaca, where I realized my words have power, surrounded by art, color, and sacred rituals. Ghost Ranch, where I felt myself ground fully for the first time.

I want that feeling again. I want MORE. I sense the tap on my shoulder—Journee calling me. Accept the proposal, fly into the unknown. And yet… fear creeps in, whispering hesitation. Is there something else that is on the horizon?

Today and tomorrow Mercury Cazimi burns through confusion. I remember my reading: January through March, a season of shedding, of letting go. Of making space for the next chapter. DO NOT GO BACK.

My inner child stirs, reminding me of the dreams I once had—dreams of writing, of flying the skies, of creating. I’ve always been a maker, a dreamer, a seeker who moves with the tides of imagination.

A recommendation for me on Insight Timer was When You Feel Stuck by Mark Rowland. This phrase stuck with me: “find the flow in the stillness before the next chapter”. Stillness. I’ve felt it before. I know it. I am now more aware of my inner self, the shifts. Perhaps this stillness, this emptiness, isn’t a void to fear but a clearing. A pause before the next adventure. A moment to breathe, to declutter, to prepare. I pulled a star at Ghost Ranch—Appreciative Awareness—and maybe now, finally, I understand.

Can you feel it too? That stirring inside, the call to trust the unknown? Elevating. Expanding.